Be Unoffended

 The Choice to Be Unoffended

I know I’ve written about offense before, but let’s be honest—this topic never really gets old. Whether you’re a Christian or not, offense is the bait of Satan. You’re welcome to agree or disagree, but truth doesn’t change based on how we spin it.

Here’s the hard part (and yes, I’m talking to myself too): you choose to be offended. No one makes that decision for you. It doesn’t matter how something is said, who says it, or even the tone behind it. At the end of the day, it comes down to how you choose to receive it.

Now, let’s be clear—if someone is being a jerk, that’s on them. Fully. But when I choose to react in offense, that part? That’s on me. We always have two options: ignore it or respond. And if I respond in anger, sarcasm, or defensiveness, I’m really no better than the person who set me off in the first place. Ouch.

I’ve had plenty of moments where someone said something or behaved a certain way and—boom—self-control left the building. But I’ve learned that when I choose not to react, my outcomes are almost always better. Bonus: I don’t have to go back to God in repentance for my reaction. The other person can take their attitude up with Him—I chose peace.

Let me be clear: I have not mastered the art of being unoffendable. This is very much a work in progress. Shutting up sounds easy until it’s actually time to do it. But every time I choose love over offense, it’s worth it.

Proverbs 19:11 says it best:
 “Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.”

Jesus also taught us to forgive “seventy-seven times” and to turn the other cheek—not because people deserve it, but because we are called to something higher. Being slow to anger gives us space to listen, process our emotions, and respond with self-control instead of impulse.

Here’s another truth we don’t talk about enough: sometimes people are mean because they’re hurting. Maybe they’re dealing with trauma, having a terrible day, or their life just feels really hard in that moment. That doesn’t excuse bad behavior—but it does remind us not to respond with more anger. Love them. Let God handle the hothead. That’s not your job.

God sees, hears, and knows everything. He reminds us in Romans 12:19 that vengeance is His, not ours. Our role is love, not retaliation.

So here’s the takeaway, friends: when someone is being extra, choose love over offense. If someone is nasty, that’s not a you problem—it’s a them problem. We don’t need to match their negative energy or one-up them with anger. Just love them the best you can. After all, it’s really hard to stay angry when someone responds with kindness.

Sometimes that means sacrificing pride for peace—even when we think the other person doesn’t deserve it. But remember, we’re not the judge either. Matthew 7 reminds us of that.

Bottom line: you choose whether or not to be offended. Nobody makes that decision for you. Period. Choose love. Choose to listen. Choose to learn—because none of us are too old, too smart, or too experienced to grow.

As James 1:19 reminds us:
 “Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger.”

Still learning. Still growing. Still choosing love. 💛

<3 God Bless 

Jane 

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